You are likely reading this because you are looking for how to hire faster.
And I get it. You’re buried in noise. Slack’s blowing up. Your inbox is overflowing. Your calendar’s a game of Tetris played with bricks.
And right then—when your bandwidth is maxed—someone says the most hopeful five words a founder can hear: “We found someone to help.”
Your brain stops scanning for Talent… and starts grasping for Relief. Welcome to Warm Body Mode.
The "Sustainable Misery" State
Dr. Daniel Friedland calls this threat circuitry—when the brain shifts from strategic thinking to survival behavior. You shortcut. You rationalize. You stop evaluating. You just want the pain to stop.
Here is the irony of "Hiring Faster": The fastest way to slow your company down is to hire the wrong person quickly.
- The Myth: "I need a body in the seat to handle the volume."
- The Truth: A misaligned hire creates more volume—in clean-up, retraining, and eventual firing.
- The Fix: Don’t hire for speed. Hire for friction-removal.
It’s a hidden cost of success. You look great on paper. But inside? You’re trapped. Drowning in ops. Grasping for a high-level admin who can give you your calendar—and your life—back.
The Perfect Candidate... Until She Wasn’t
- Resume: Impressive
- Interview: Polished
- Offer: Accepted immediately
Then came the onboarding gap—that crucial window between offer and start date. The founder’s Chief of Staff sent a routine paperwork request.
- Friday: Silence.
- Monday: “Hey, just checking in…”
- Tuesday: “Oh sorry—I’ll get to it.”
And here’s where most founders fall into the trap.
Enter: The Itty-Bitty-Shitty Committee
That internal voice starts whispering:
- “She’s probably just busy wrapping up her old job.”
- “Maybe it went to spam.”
- “Let’s just get her started—I’ll coach the communication issues later.”
This is where relief becomes a lie. You’re not evaluating a future teammate. You’re fantasizing about finally being able to breathe.
As Maya Angelou reminds us: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”
To their credit, the team didn’t flinch. The Chief of Staff and hiring manager compared notes, saw a pattern of poor follow-through, and acted. They rescinded the offer before Day One.
Hired. Then fired. Before ever logging into Slack. And it was the best leadership decision they could’ve made.
The Myth of “Hire Slow, Fire Fast”
We’ve all heard it. “Hire slow, fire fast.” But here’s how that plays out in founder reality:
- 60 days of wasted payroll
- 4 broken processes
- 1 demoralized team
- 1 reputation hit with your customers
Harvard Business Review nails it in The Founder’s Dilemma:
“Early-stage companies that scale with misaligned hires spend 3–5x longer correcting organizational drift than those that pause to hire right.”
The Real Problem Isn’t Recruiting—It’s Reflection
Warm body hires don’t stem from bad job boards. They stem from founder blind spots:
1. Scarcity-Based Decision Making Gino Wickman, in Traction, reminds us: “You can’t make great people decisions from a place of chaos.” When you’re overwhelmed, you mistake motion for progress.
2. Desperation Masquerading as Urgency Urgency says: “Act with intention.” Desperation says: “Act at any cost.”
3. Lack of a Repeatable Pre-Start Filter Most teams over-index on interviews and under-index on follow-through.
The Pre-Start Stress Test
Want to protect your team and culture? Use these Trojan Horse Diagnostics before Day One.
The Response Audit Send a simple, non-urgent request: “Can you send over a headshot for the team page by Friday?”
- Pass: Prompt acknowledgment + early delivery
- Fail: Silence or last-minute scramble
The Curiosity Test Do they ask meaningful questions about your company, values, or team?
- Pass: They’re preparing to lead
- Fail: They’re waiting to be told what to do
Dr. Tasha Eurich, in Insight, found that 95% of people believe they’re self-aware—but only 10–15% actually are. So don’t test for confidence. Test for curiosity and follow-through.
The Blind Spot Founders Must Name
You can’t scale what you haven’t defined. If your expectations are vague... If your onboarding has no filter... If you’re hiring for speed over alignment...
You’re designing for default—not excellence.
And when your standards slip, your team feels it. Your culture absorbs it. And your customers see the cracks.
Bottom Line: Relief Isn’t the Goal. Leadership Is.
Leadership is saying: “I’d rather go short-handed than hire the wrong person.”
Leadership is asking: “Am I hiring someone who removes friction—or creates more?”
Leadership is remembering: “I’m not filling a seat. I’m protecting a culture.”
If You’re at That Hiring Crossroads...
Pause. Audit your hiring patterns. Ask yourself: “Am I hiring for peace—or for progress?”
And if you’re not sure where your standard has slipped? Don’t guess. Let the data tell you.
[Button: Take the Growth Ceiling Audit] (Identify the specific friction point holding your business back in 5 minutes)
